Memento Mori…

Sunsets are moving ever so slightly to later in the day. Rays of light and warmth peak over the white crested hills earlier and earlier. Winter, although still making its presence known, is slowly slipping away. In the passing of the next couple of months a shift will occur. Moisture will slowly percolate down into the soil, while that same soil’s temperature will slowly rise. Eventually an explosion of microscopic life will begin to work, and then the growing season will begin.

        The longer I stay here, on this farm, the more fitting and magical and miraculous and mundane this whole cycle becomes. It’s quite intoxicating actually. It’s this bizarre balance of absolute complexity working in the midst of simplicity. It’s a cycle that contains life, growth, death, rest, coldness, warmth, surface level disturbance, and new life presenting itself again. And, whether we like to admit it or not, it’s a cycle that includes everything…including us.

Monks working on a Mandala

        In the Buddhist Tradition there is a mediative practice of making what is known as a “Sand Mandala.” Basically, different colors and pieces of sand are positioned to create overly intricate and amazingly beautiful pieces of art. Depending on the size and complexity of the piece it can take days, weeks, months, or even longer to complete. Each individual grain of sand contributing to the image of the whole. Mandalas can look quite stunning. After the piece is completed the mandala is put to its purpose. It is destroyed.

A Mandala being destroyed

        In the Christian Tradition there is a contemplative spiritual practice known as “Memento Mori”, Latin for “Remember your Death.” Within this practice, through meditation the goal is to contemplate, internalize, and accept ones own fragility, mortality, and the temporary state of one’s own existence. Throughout Europe there are chapels and ossuaries dedicated to “Memento Mori”, where upon entering you see the entire structure decorated not in beautiful paintings or statues, but human bones. Skulls, Femurs, Hands. A stark reminder, that all of our hopes and wishes, dreams, successes and failures, will one day be like us. Dead, gone, and changed into something else with an entirely different role to play in the workings of the cycle of life that we currently participate in.

Our original Barn, back in its prime

        Being cognizant of this reality has gifted me with a tremendous sense of awe and wonder, humility and hope. You see, I deal with the realities of death and life on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes it hits pretty hard, other times you just accept it as how things play out, and other times you recognize that in order for this whole thing to keep working in a healthy life promoting way there just simply has to be death.

The Same Barn Looking a little rough

Dismantling Beginning

Slowly Slipping Away

However, in every instance that I have experienced, any one particular death was never the end of the story, it was just the end of one part of the story that provided the starting point for the next. There’s a real tangible hope within that. As I have sunk deeper into this mystery I have come to the hope that as I live and move that my life will work together to create a beautiful image- like a mandala of my life. At least for a small miniscule piece of time all of the pieces of those who came before me join with the pieces that presently surround me to make something worth looking at, even for just a short time. That all the pieces of this farm, past and present form and work together to heal and build up soil while also producing those things needed for other parts of our society and culture. That the different parts of myself that have grown by the presence of others, will hopefully do the same for the people that I share my time and life with.

Something New in the Works

This is a reality that involves all of us, and believe it or not you have what it takes to start humbly placing each grain of sand that has come your way in life into a truly beautiful image. An image that has the ability to add so much to lives of others, even for just a short amount of time. Do what you can, aim up, and you’ll end up contributing something worthwhile to the next part of the story after your part finishes.

Peace~

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